WEBVTT

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The Weather Gods and Poop Rock

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A long, long time ago, the
weather gods had much to do.

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They sent the mist and the sun showers,

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Brought the winds that blew the
flowers and the cool winds of fall,

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Sprinkled the powdery snow and
the large snowflakes too,

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And sometimes even called down
the scary typhoons and storms.

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They watched over the whole wide world.

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“Here, there, everywhere….”

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“Ouch! My head hurts!”

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When their work was done, the weather
gods sat down on a rock to play.

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This rock was the “Weather
God Rock” in Jeolla-do.

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The people who lived below the Weather
God Rock made their living as farmers.

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They grew rice, beans,
corn, and sweet potatoes.

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They had many farms to plant
and many things to do.

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One year, the farmers became very worried.

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“Oh dear, oh dear. What are
our weather gods doing?”

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“They haven’t sent any rain. What
in the world could they be doing?”

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“Are they playing Baduk
on the Weather God Rock?”

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“Have they gone off to see the world?”

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“We need the weather gods to send
the rain for the crops to grow.”

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“Maybe we need to go up to the Weather
God Rock and see what’s going on.”

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The people whispered among themselves
and started to make a plan.

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From that day on.

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Sizzle, sizzle! Bubble, bubble!

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The people carefully prepared
food with sincerity.

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Even though things were hard,
they made rice cakes and liquor.

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The women of the village enjoyed
themselves and ate lots of food.

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They made barley rice and
ate it up—munch, much!

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They boiled and feasted
on corn—crunch, crunch.

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They roasted sweet potatoes
and gobbled them up—yum yum!

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They ate their fill and
patted their bellies.

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They waited patiently, letting out a fart.

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“Where are you going?”

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“I’m going to the bathroom to pee.”

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“Make sure you don’t poop!”

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After a few days, the people of the
village gathered under a large tree.

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“Let’s go up, let’s go up,

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Let’s go up to the Weather God Rock!

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Since we can’t have any bad luck,

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We can’t bring anyone who has eaten meat,

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Anyone who has seen a snake,

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Anyone who has been in a fight,

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Anyone who has been to the mourner's house,

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Or anyone who has not taken a bath!”

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“Oh, I’m going to die.”

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“I really have to poop!”

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“Hold it just a little bit longer.”

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The women of the village prepared a feast on
the Weather God Rock and bowed their heads.

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“Oh dear weather gods,
oh dear weather gods!

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If you have noses, smell
this delicious food.

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If you have mouths, taste this feast.

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If you have ears, hear our words.

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If you have eyes, look
down over our fields.

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Please, send down the much-needed
rain over our land!”

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“Oh dear weather gods, hear us…”

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“Oh dear weather gods,

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Will it rain tonight?

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Will it rain tomorrow?

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Will it rain the day after tomorrow?”

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The leader of the women asked.

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“What are we doing now?”

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“How long do we have to hold it?”

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“Oh no!”

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“I can’t hold it any longer.”

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“I’ve got to let it out soon!”

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The people played making loud noises
on the Weather God Rock.

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So that the weather gods would
come down on the rainclouds.

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“Sing, people, sing!

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Call and call the rain!

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Call and call the weather gods!”

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“Ok everyone, there’s just one
more important thing to do.

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You’ve had a hard time trying
not to poop, haven’t you?

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Ok, get ready, everyone….”

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The men cleared their throats and
stood back as far as they could.

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Without a sound, the women pulled
up their skirts and squatted down.

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The children as well quick hurried
and pulled down their pants.

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“Push, push! Plop!”

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Poop spread completely across the rock.

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Sticky poop like rice!

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Squishy and watery poop!

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Poop pointed like icicles!

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Round poop like little eggs.

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Thick long trails of poop!

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Poop that spread far and wide!

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Poop in big, heaping piles!

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Piles of golden poop even lay piled
on the weather gods’ checkers board.

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“Oh, that’s so disgusting!”

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“Look at that poop—that one’s mine!”

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“Be quiet!”

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“Quickly, quickly, let’s go!”

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“Everyone, hurry up!”

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“Are we just going to go home
without saying anything?”

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“Be quiet, be quiet!”

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“Pretend you don’t know what happened!”

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“Don’t talk or you’ll get in trouble!”

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“Shh!”

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“Who did this?”

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“Our rock has turned into poop!”

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“Barf”

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“It wasn’t just a couple of people!”

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“Hurry and call down the
rainclouds to wash it away.”

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“Rainclouds won’t be enough.”

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“Call down the lightning
and thundershowers!”

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“Call down the heavy rains for the fields,
the pouring rain—call down everything!”

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When fall came, the fields were
filled with golden crops.

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The people who lived under the Weather God
Rock no longer worried about drought.

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Every year, the rice and bean farmers planted their
crops and lived and ate well without a care.

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That’s because they all knew the
secret of how to call down the rain!